


you hold the other line

by angelacaduca (kallistei)



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-08
Updated: 2014-05-08
Packaged: 2018-01-24 01:26:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1586597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kallistei/pseuds/angelacaduca
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaejoong's first instinct is never to do the thing he knows he's supposed to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you hold the other line

**Author's Note:**

> For [](http://jaeho-challenge.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://jaeho-challenge.livejournal.com/)**jaeho_challenge** ; theme 2 - 'real life events'.

Jaejoong knows that the first person he should call is their manager. That's not what he does, though. Instead his fingers stab at speed dial 2 (1's his family home). He takes a deep breath, then another as he listens to the ringing, isn't really sure if he wants it to be answered or not. (Wants the comfort of a familiar voice, doesn't want to worry him, knows this should be heard directly, not filtered through their manager's words too-early tomorrow morning, with all the others there.)

Yunho sounds half-asleep when he answers. Jaejoong imagines Yunho curled on his side under the covers, phone tucked against his ear and blinking his eyes into focus as he looks at the clock, imagines him starting to worry as he realises the time. (2am, either too early or too late for any good news.) Jaejoong feels yet another stab of guilt at the way Yunho's voice sharpens between, "Hello?" and, "Jaejoong-ah, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, Yunho-yah," Jaejoong replies, repeats himself because he doesn't think once is quite enough to say just how much he regrets what he did. "I'm sorry. Did something really stupid." Yunho answers with automatic reassurances, instinctive and yet so sincere that Jaejoong can't help being comforted despite the way his feelings of guilt just keep getting worse. He knows that he's probably ruined things for them all, at least for a little while.

"Sorry for what?" Yunho asks, slow and obviously worried now.

Jaejoong finds himself smiling, unexpected, incongruous, at how easy it is to read the emotions in Yunho's voice, at how easy it's always been for him. Then the smile fades; he knows he has to tell, wonders how he can say it in a way that'll cause Yunho the least possible amount of distress. He can't think, ends up just blurting out, "Got arrested, sorry, so stupid," in a quiet, mortified rush. Over his own breathing and Yunho's, he can hear the soft rustle of the covers as Yunho sits up.

There's silence, more breaths, more time for Jaejoong to try to shrivel into himself before Yunho says, "You what?" The words are slow and calm and Jaejoong recognises the sound of Yunho halfway between panic and anger, sharper worry underlining it all. It makes him want to reach out and hug Yunho, knowing that Yunho won't believe that Jaejoong's okay until he can touch Jaejoong and see for himself, but Yunho's halfway across the city; Jaejoong can't leave and Yunho can't come to him.

"Sorry," Jaejoong says again, knowing there'll never be enough apologies, that Yunho probably doesn't want to hear them now, but Jaejoong can't stop saying it. He's hurt them all but it's going to be Yunho's life he's made the most difficult.

"Don't," Yunho almost snaps. "Tell me what happened. Where are you?"

Jaejoong shakes his head, then remembers that Yunho can't see the action. "Don't come here." They can't afford it. "I'm okay. I... You know I went out. Was driving home, got stopped." He lets Yunho fill in the blanks. (The way his heart sank, how he couldn't refuse the test even though he knew what'd happen, how he ended up here.)

Yunho sighs. "Oh, Jaejoong," he says quietly. He doesn't mention how stupid it was, doesn't ask, 'How could you?' and Jaejoong doesn't know whether to be grateful for that or to wish for the words so he didn't have to keep saying them to himself.

Jaejoong hates the silence, starts speaking to fill it. He doesn't even really know what he's saying, idiotic things like 'It's not so bad,' and 'It'll be okay, won't it?' and 'They'll figure something out.' He doesn't know who they are. Maybe he means management, maybe he means 'you', not 'they'. Yunho doesn't say anything; only the sound of Yunho's breathing lets Jaejoong know that Yunho hasn't hung up on him, that Jaejoong's not just babbling to himself, that he's not alone with this.

When Jaejoong runs out of things to say, his voice grinding to a halt at last, he hears Yunho take a slow, deep breath almost in synchrony with Jaejoong's. Then Yunho says, "It'll be okay, Jaejoong," sounding so confident that Jaejoong doesn't have any choice but to believe him.

"Promise?" Jaejoong asks, not sure that he likes how childlike the question sounds, but Yunho's promises are always kept and he needs the reassurance.

"Promise," Yunho replies, not a second of hesitation. "Things'll be difficult for a while, but then it'll be okay," he amends, but Jaejoong had expected that. The word before it had been all he wanted, though.

"Thanks, Yunho-yah," Jaejoong says, nodding to himself. "I think I should call manager-hyung now."

There's another rustle of sheets - Yunho getting out of bed. "Yeah," Yunho agrees. "I'll tell the others." It's not a question. It doesn't need to be - they know each other too well for that.

Jaejoong hesitates on another thank you, then says it anyway. Yunho replies, "No need. I love you, Jaejoong-ah," quiet and easy and natural, and that's even better than the promise.

"You too," Jaejoong says, no louder than Yunho had been. He adds a quick, "Bye," before he ends the call, then allows himself a deep breath before he dials their manager's number, ready to make the easier confession.


End file.
